Intuition & Midlife Crisis
Paving your own way.
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Earlier this year, I was watching a show on Netflix called Designated Survivor.
There was a brief yet profound conversation between a husband and wife that captivated me. The husband, in his first few weeks as President of the United States, was seeking guidance. He turned to his wife, the First Lady, to share his doubts about navigating the complexities of his role.
“If you listen to your instincts, you’ll do the right thing,” she said.
He replied, “It’d be a lot easier if someone left behind a manual.”
To which she responded, “I guarantee you, past presidents didn’t have it all figured out either. They were just people like you, trying to do their best.”
I paused the TV for a moment to let that sink in.
In moments of uncertainty, it’s natural to wish for a roadmap, for someone else to provide the answers. But life doesn’t come with an instruction manual. When you’re forging your own path, there is no path—it’s yours to create.
That’s exciting and scary.
Over the years I’ve been learning to tune into my inner compass, my intuition, and allow it to guide me. I feel our souls arrived here with a purpose, carrying whispers of the journey they intended to take. These whispers—our intuition—hold the wisdom we need to navigate life. Whether we embrace their message or resist it, that voice within us always knows the way.
Not listening to your intuition for an extended period of time is at the heart of a mid-life crisis. It’s about being out of alignment with your truest identity. You wake up to this truth for the first time: the life quietly waiting to burst forth within you and the one you’re living are out of sync.
To uncover that voice, it’s important to pause, reflect, and feel.
Contrary to what we’re taught, you don’t need a whole 5 year plan laid out.
Just the next best step.
Keep it simple.
As Boyd Varty writes in The Lion Tracker’s Guide to Life, life is about “finding the first track” (the next moment) and then the next first track. Step by step, we pave the way forward. In other words, the next best thing.
I find that life is mostly made up of a bunch of small impulses. Every now and again there might be an overwhelming urge toward something (or away from something), but that’s not usually the case. The truth is, it’s about the small impulses we follow each day that create our path in the longterm.
Joseph Campbell, in his Hero’s Journey, reminds us of the importance of mentors along the way. Guides have appeared for me when I’ve needed them most, helping me grow in new ways.
However, there’s a fine balance—we can lean too heavily on them, outsourcing our trust and avoiding the responsibility of our own decisions. In doing so, we disempower ourselves, kicking the can down the road and constantly seeking answers from others.
Think about this:
In school, we were handed a set curriculum every year. Rarely were we taught to decide for ourselves what to study or how to learn. We were even told what the measure of intelligence was.
Conditioning starts even earlier, with our parents. When we arrive on Earth, our parents are often our first guides, teaching us what it means to be human: what to value, how to react, what’s important, and what’s not.
While this guidance is vital for a new earthling, it can also train us to rely on external voices over our own inner knowing.
As we move into the new year, reflect on these questions:
What is your intuition telling you?
What do you want to start valuing more?
What do you need to release?
What do you want to continue nurturing?
Do you want to slow down or increase the pace?
Remember, there is no ‘right’ way. There is only your way.
Not everyone will agree with the path you choose, and that’s okay. Peace doesn’t come from external validation, but from knowing your decisions align with your soul.
The ability to listen to our intuition is a gift we all possess. Yet, in the chaos of life, many of us become disconnected—numbed by distraction or weighed down by unhealed trauma.
Reconnecting requires courage.
You must feel to heal, and heal to feel.
The deeper we go on this journey, the more we get in tune with our heart and feel more love and connection with all of life. In the end, isn’t that what it’s all about? More love and connection with yourself? With others? With life itself?
Without this alignment, we risk following paths dictated by others’ expectations, straying far from our true selves.
Intuition is subtle; it doesn’t shout but whispers. It invites us to slow down, tune into our bodies, and recognize the resonance of what feels right.
Your soul already knows the way.
All it asks is that you truly listen, be gentle, and be patient.
Take it one small step at a time.
You got this.
Love,
V
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Great reminder about the fine line between connecting with mentors and coaches when necessary but not completely outsourcing the guidance of your life to them.