Doubt.
When it jumps out of the shadows.
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Soul Circle
Soul Circle is a monthly group Zoom call. It is a safe space to pause, exhale, and unwind the story in your soul. We do a guided meditation and have a deep reflective conversation with questions.
Next one is September 25th at 6PM BST (replays available).
A few kind words written by an attendee:
No matter how I feel going into each Soul Circle, I leave feeling wholesome, present and most importantly, authentically energised.
I love the structure of the Soul Circle where we start off with a meditation. It really gives me the opportunity to put any challenges of my day to one side as I embark on pouring into myself.
I always have so much admiration for the topics, they are always purposeful and meaningful, arriving just on time! I am often like a giddy child smiling and laughing throughout the circle as the topics resonate with me.
V's questions and prompts are so poignant! They allow for reflection, authenticity and really show me where I am sitting in my head, encouraging me and leading me back to my heart.
Thank you, V, the Soul Circles have been a game changer for me. I have loved meeting like-minded individuals. To be vulnerable in such a safe space is truly liberating. See you all at the next one :)
A recent song I’ve been listening to:
Doubt
The time between my post last week on Sunday and this one feels like years ago.
Time has felt like a blur.
Have you felt it?
The last few days I’ve been dancing with doubt.
Do you ever wonder what would’ve happened if you made a different choice in the past?
For the first time I contemplated whether I should’ve done things differently on my journey.
I studied Law at University in 2013 and went to Law School in 2014. Towards the end of my time, my gut told me my journey had come to an end with it. I wasn’t going to practise.
Whilst I thoroughly enjoyed studying, making new friends, meeting my ex-girlfriend at university, watching a whole lots of Suits, I sensed another path awaited. One I would later realise was engineered to help me uncover my gifts.
After a recent passionate debate about emotional intelligence, holding space, and education, with
(my partner), she said to me “Wow you would’ve been an incredible lawyer”.A compliment.
One of my gifts in this life is my ability to communicate well. I’m good at simplifying complex things, relaying nuance, and translating emotions into words.
Hours after our conversation ended, her words stayed with me.
“You would’ve been an incredible lawyer”
Hmmm.
It was an innocent compliment, but I felt the weight of those words because of the doubt that was already ripening inside of me as of recent.
Should I have been a lawyer?
Did I make the wrong choice back then?
There was certainly a timeline for me to become a lawyer, but I chose a different timeline because I did what was right for me in that moment (and that’s not to say another timeline isn’t always available because I do feel we have multiple paths always available to us).
Since then I’ve been on an incredible journey of self-discovery and healing which continues to this day.
A few years after university I ended up in the world of sales at a recruitment agency and then doing in-house Talent Acquisition for a big broadcasting business in the UK. It helped me build confidence and understand how to build relationships with all types of people. I left my job as a Senior Recruiter in 2022 to go full-time into coaching.
By this point I knew very clearly that another gift I came with on this planet was to hold space for humans. To help them feel seen and heard. To help them unravel the deeper story, truth, and wisdom that lay inside them. In that way, I am a healer. The more I’ve healed, the more I’ve discovered my capacity to create a safe space for others to heal themselves emotionally too.
But the last few days I’ve been questioning it all.
My journey has felt anything but easy.
Healing has felt hard.
Emotions have felt heavy.
Momentum with business has been slow.
Maybe I’m trying to do something I’m not capable of?
Am I going to be ok in the future?
Will everything work itself out?
How long do I keep believing?
Then,
You’re not going anywhere in life.
Ah.
There it is.
Dad’s voice.
The voice that’s been waiting to come to the surface arrived and I gave it more room this time because it caught me whilst I was already wobbly.
This is all part of the medicine path.
Every situation can to be an opportunity to heal and let go on a deeper level. I feel like a snake ready to shed its skin, especially since we’re in Autumn now. The unknown feels scary again. Everything has felt a little more heightened.
I acknowledge the doubt and hear the voices.
I’ve had some of the most beautiful human interactions these last couple of years but they have also been some of the most emotionally challenging I’ve experienced. The anger, shame, sadness, guilt, and grief has felt unbearable at times.
Doubt found me patiently sitting as its prey this week.
I remind myself one step at a time, one day at a time.
If you’re questioning your decisions and your path, you’re not alone. I think it’s a natural part of the human experience when you’re trying to live an authentic life and find your own place in the world. You figure it out day by day. We wing it as best we can.
I’ve also been honouring the little boy inside me this week who says..
I wish my parents were who I needed them to be (but then I wouldn’t be who I am now says my adult self) but my heart still feels sad. I needed someone to hug me and ask me if I was ok and if there anything they could do to help. To valid my feelings instead of ridicule them. To share stories about how they navigated times of trouble instead of lecture me about “right” and “wrong”. A mum and dad who felt safe, and free of expectation and pressure.
Life is certainly not linear and it’s a hell of a game to be a part of!
To end this on a slightly lighter note, here’s a meme that made me smile:
Love,
V
If you want to learn more about working privately with me 1-1 then have a read of this page and if you have any questions you can DM me.
I get you brother- i'm so glad you are able to see those old beliefs and voices that were never your own. Keep following that big beautiful heart guiding you to wholeness on your perfect path
It's only in looking back that we are able to see what these periods of questioning led us to, but in the meantime it's very difficult to sit in the discomfort of doubt. We know that's when we need to double down on our soul wisdom but the answers usually remain unclear (at least in my experience). All we can do is keep showing up one foot in front of the other, asking to be led, while listening to the niggles of our heart.
Be well Vipul.